Glory Pro Wrestling Turns Up the Summertime Heat
There’s not enough magic left in our lives, and there’s not enough simple human connection. We’re all here in this world, in this city, but we spend our time hiding behind glass and plastic screens, connected by miles of wire but disconnected from the rhythm of life by the AI lies and algorithmically personalized ad experiences that come through it.
You’re reading this through a screen right now, unless you currently hear us shouting at you, in which case we’re all in trouble.
In the age of deepfake division, there’s something beautiful about being in a room together, all experiencing the same moment, live and in person. Glory Pro, the premier league of STL pro wrestling, does an excellent job of providing that experience for both the loyal regulars and newcomers, and you’ll have another chance to be one or the other on Sunday, July 26th at the Casa Loma Ballroom (3354 Iowa Ave) when they present ‘The Heat Is On’.
Photos by Erik Alan Carlson – @sonicgallerystl
To get you ready for STL’s biggest summer wrestling event, here’s a recap of their last show, ‘For My City’, Glory Pro’s salute to St Louis wrestling from the South Broadway Athletic Club (2301 South 7th St) on Sunday, May 31st.
The seats were filled, and the historic SBAC was packed with a broad cross-section of the population, all coming out to celebrate the talent and drive of our homegrown stars. Men, women, everyone in-between, and children of all ages were amped up and ready to go as STL’s finest announcer Ben Simon welcomed them to the show.
That enthusiasm took a swift nose dive when Dan ‘The Working Man’ Adams immediately stalked to the ring to deliver his manifesto, snatching the mic from Simon while uninviting himself to his ex-friend’s wedding. No longer willing to be a father figure, the former ‘Dad’ declared that he was here to teach the ‘Big Strong Boy’ Ethan Price a lesson and that their match later was now to be the #1 Contender for the Crown of Glory Championship.
Visually impressive Dante Pharaoh may hail from the top of the pyramid, but ‘Good Vibes’ Chris Hendrix came out on top of their opening contest with an Overdrive. We’re tempted to make jokes about Pharaoh being in de-Nile, but we have strict rules about messing with people in gold skull masks, so we’re letting it go.
Charging straight from the Horse’s Stable to the beat of ‘Pink Pony Club’, ‘Enchanting’ Talon Graves and ‘Natural’ Atlas Armstrong of The Thoroughbreds returned to Glory Pro to let the audience know just what they thought of them. The crowd erupted when almost-hometown favorites The Revolution burst out of the curtain to save them from the Barbie Boy antics. It looked like the teamwork and energy of Quest Parker and Anthony Lopes would score a heroic victory, but through distraction and miscommunication the Thoroughbreds took the tag team contest.
Photo by Erik Alan Carlson – @sonicgallerystl
Next out, the superfly superstar ‘Street Reaper’ Mike Outlaw came to the ring with long-time manager and ally Cinko. Both men seemingly accepted the cheers and respect of the audience in what appears to be a change of heart for the pair as they awaited their opponent.
“I’m a shark!” bellowed ‘The Underwater Wet Body’ Phil Shark, making his entrance in a full shark onesie to the sound of ‘Ocean Man’ by Ween.
“Shark! Shark! Shark!’ the crowd chanted back as he circled the ring, slapping fin fives and waving at his section of fin-atics.
Why was the best dressed wrestler in STL squaring off against a grown man with a nautical fixation and a rubber shark head, you ask? It doesn’t matter, because it was incredibly entertaining. Like comedy, stage magic, and true love, wrestling works best if you don’t over-analyze it. Just go with it and let yourself get wrapped up in the feeling of the moment.
Phil Shark felt many moments of being wrapped up by the vicious Outlaw, who might be slightly nicer to the crowd but is still the most dangerous Glory Pro competitor between the ropes. Shark managed to swim his way out of trouble many times before the experience of Outlaw caught up with him, a Shooting Shark Press directly onto Outlaw’s knees then a hard Stunner left Shark beached for the three count.
Cinko joined Outlaw inside the ring, both men staring at the prone Shark, who tried to beg off any more violence as Outlaw extended his hand in a show of respect. Encouraged by the crowd, Shark allowed Outlaw to help him up and was flanked by both men. The audience held its collective breath, certain that Outlaw was about to make Shark fin soup, but instead they let Shark take a bow as the audience cheered and left the ring peacefully.
We’re not sure what specific type of labor Dan Adams currently works in, but we suspect it’s got something to do with vacuums because he sure does suck all the fun out of the room. The heartbroken fans loudly let ‘The Working Man’ know just how much he’d betrayed them by turning his back on them and the much-beloved ‘Big Strong Boy’.
“Not my dad! Not my dad!” the crowd shouted at Adams. A young fan waved a handmade ‘NO DAD ZONE’ sign in the front row. Unfazed by the caterwauling, Adams appeared to revel in the sadness of the folks he once called family as he menaced them with his giant pipe wrench.
The crowd’s chosen champion (and eternal MCM office favorite) ‘Big Strong Boy’ Ethan Price seethed his way down the entrance, seemingly soaking up the audience adoration while boiling over with rage for his teammate turned tormentor. Price barely had time to get in the ring before the scene turned into an explosion of fists as both men looked to prove their point through punches.
It wasn’t pretty. No one hates more than someone who loved, so there must have been a lot of love lost for these two to beat on each other like that. Both tried to make the other tap out before Price wrenched Adams’ arm in ways it shouldn’t bend to force the submission. A poor loser, Adams attacked the throat of the new #1 Contender with his wrench until Tootie Lynn and Rahim De La Suede ran out to make the save, chasing ‘The Working Man’ off…for now.
Intermission followed, and the popular spots seemed to be the bar and outside the venue to give the crowd a chance to reset themselves from all the intensity for the second half.
Photo by Erik Alan Carlson – @sonicgallerystl
We are definitely not inviting ‘International Pop Star’ B3CCA to our next birthday party. The 3 isn’t silent, and neither is she, as she turned getting the crowd to sing ‘Happy Birthday’ to opponent Blair Onyx (and unseen higher power Source) into an opportunity to gift Onyx with some boots to the head. Apparently pain is the gift that keeps giving for Glory Pro’s resident spooky girl Onyx, who used it as fuel to chase the singer around before getting the win with a move we’re dubbing the Goth-style Neutralizer.
Martial arts master and local legend Tootie Lynn, ‘The Little Blue Dragon’, kicked her way out of the curtain carrying the championship hopes of the city with her. Could she wrest the Women’s World Crown away from the Iowan invader, athletically-gifted major mean girl Maggie Lee? The STL crowd believed Lynn would, and it seemed Lee did too, attempting to leave the match early instead of facing the Dragon’s feet of fury. The escape attempt failed, so Lee attacked Lynn’s lower body repeatedly, eventually weakening the striker’s legs enough to get a roll-up pin by holding the tail on Lynn’s outfit outside of the ref’s field of view.
Crestfallen, Lynn sat in the center of the ring as Lee slunk off in triumph. Lynn and the crowd were all visibly frustrated with the referee for his error in judgment. We’ve heard the one about pulling a dragon’s tail, so we don’t think this is over between these competitors. Glory Pro’s first-ever all-women’s event, ‘Women’s World Crown’, is coming up in August, maybe they’ll get to settle it there?
Well, this is embarrassing. We’ve described the excellence of the four athletes in the United Glory Tag Team Championship match so many times that we’ve run out of unique ways to do it without making up words or changing languages, and it’s hard enough to get people to read ohne auf Deutsch umzusteigen.
Reigning champs The Collab (Laynie Luck & Shazza McKenzie) faced former champs Davey Bang & August Matthews to decide the fate of the titles, which were physically there. All four of them are incredibly versatile performers who are fun to watch. See for yourself, here’s the match from Ascend, Glory Pro’s weekly show:
We won’t even tell you who won, no spoilers. Leave your review in the video comments so we can copy off your homework next time. Come to ‘The Heat Is On’ Sun, July 26th to see WWE ID Champion Laynie Luck defend that prestigious title against Shazza McKenzie and tell them how awesome they are in person. Just don’t be the type who repeatedly shouts their names the whole match.
Main event time. It’s no secret that Rahim De La Suede is our guy. We are from STL and MCM is about STL, so anyone repping STL like ‘The Whole Thang’ is gonna get our love. That being said, Kody ‘Koko’ Lane has been a good champion during his time as the longest-reigning holder of the Crown of Glory title and ‘The Southern Flamingo’ has been a fair competitor up to this point, so the crowd wasn’t sure how to feel when the two faced each other for that ultimate prize.
We’re pretty sure the only person in the ring getting boos as the always-erudite Ben Simon did the championship intros was referee Jerry Looney, returning in front of the crowd for the first time after his missed call in the Women’s World Crown match.
As the match started, both men showed why they’re in the main event, with flashy style and skilled athleticism carrying them through the early goings until the champ started to get frustrated by not being able to keep the tenacious challenger down. Suede knew this was his chance and nothing was going to stop him, so Lane cranked up the aggression to compensate for his opponent, eventually just beating on Suede’s torso to tire him out.
Both men were determined to win the title, but both men couldn’t win this contest of wills, so something had to give. Surprisingly, it was Lane’s sense of honor that broke first. After Suede almost won a few times, Lane decided he’d had enough and, perhaps remembering the ref’s earlier vision issues, rolled Suede up and grabbed the ropes for leverage to get the 3 count.
We’re not sure what kind of health coverage referees have, but if Jerry Looney wants to visit a good optometrist, we know a guy.
He’s definitely going to need a good chiropractor, as the frustrated Suede jumped on the prone ref and shook him like a Magic 8 Ball trying to get an answer about what just happened. Unfortunately for Suede, the reply wasn’t hazy, he’ll have to try again if he wants to be champion.
“Bullshit! Bullshit!” the crowd screamed as Lane looked pleased with himself outside the ring. Suede didn’t become champ, but he’s still a king in the hearts of the audience, who cheered when he went to get answers from the smirking Lane. Pushing Lane against the barricade, Suede didn’t see the wrench that suddenly clocked him from behind.
Photo by Erik Alan Carlson – @sonicgallerystl
Dan Adams sure seems like a man working on building the agitation of the audience, who started to come out of their seats when Adams tossed the stunned Suede into the ring. Thankfully, help wasn’t too far behind as #1 Contender Ethan Price sprinted down the walkway and bull-rushed Adams, knocking the wrench to the canvas as Suede rolled to safety.
The crowd was on their feet as the brave ‘Big Strong Boy’ bent down to pick up the wrench that had caused so much trouble. It looked like it was time to give Adams a taste of his own horrendous home improvement, but as Price swung the wrench above his head, Adams delivered a shot between Price’s legs so hard there might not be boys of any kind in his future.
As Adams reclaimed his wrench and wrapped it around Price’s neck again, a new savior seemed to appear again. It looked like Lane had enough shenanigans and slid into the ring with a chair to chase off Adams, but when Adams dropped Price, Lane proceeded to beat on the new #1 Contender with the chair as the crowd came unglued.
At this point in our retelling, we’ll have to mute the twice-betrayed crowd. They said some things that we can’t repeat here, very loudly, and as Glory Pro’s new power couple of terror took turns beating on a helpless ‘Big Strong Boy’ with no one left to save him, they said them repeatedly until Adams and Lane left the ring with no one left to stand against them. What could possibly happen next?
Will Ethan Price be big and strong enough to take both revenge and the title from Kody Lane? Will Dan Adams face the wrath of Effy for his transgressions or join the NGBC? Will the new attitude of ‘Street Reaper’ Mike Outlaw survive an encounter with the walking wall of muscle known as ‘The Gentleman Barbarian’ Bruss Hamilton? What could go wrong when Heather Reckless defends the Women’s World Crown she claims she won with tag partner Maggie Lee against Steph De Lander and Allie Katch? Are there other surprises in store?
Come be part of the moment at the Casa Loma Ballroom on Sunday, July 26th as together we find out the answers to all this and more when Glory Pro brings us the hottest wrestling event of the summer with ‘The Heat Is On’.
The stars of Glory Pro will be at St. Louis Music Park on Saturday, July 25th for photo ops at ‘The Big Throwdown’ Presented by 105.7 The Point Official Pre-Party. Starts at 5PM and admission is included with concert ticket purchase.
Tickets for ‘The Heat Is On’ are going fast, get yours online now at the Glory Pro website below before they sell out!
Get info on all things Glory Pro by going to their website (https://www.gloryprowrestling.com)
Photos by the author, @sonicgallerystl on Instagram, who had to do double duty due to a vacation in the photography department. If you’re looking for more wrestling photos, we recommend Mike Schoen Photography. See his excellent work @mschoen67 on Instagram or https://michaelschoenphotography.smugmug.com/.
